Japanese Tackle--a Linguistic Tour de Force!

[Uncle Russ]

OK, so I know that after reading this, someone is going to say: "Well, that's 10 minutes of my life I'll never get back". (The last time someone said that, I replied: "Yeah, it took me 2 minutes to write it." Anyway, what the hell--things are slow and I can't go fishing until July...

I got to reading Sea Crappie's post about trading his Zenaq and did not want to hijack the thread. He mentions his new Souls rod and it got me to thinking how much I just love the names the Japanese give their tackle. Right now, I am reading the pamphlet that comes with the Tackle House Shibuki Minnow--it carefully explains in several languages how the internal construction has been changed over the previous versions of the lure, (even giving two different numbers for the processes.) It describes the stabilization methodology that permits the lure to be trolled or retrieved at 12 knots, and it even diagrams the inside of the bait and explains how internal forces are compensated and shock-absorbed and how the body materials and I don't know what-all. Mercy! All I can say is that if Dell or MicroSoft documented their products as well as this lure is written up, setting up your home system would be absolutely foolproof.

And what is more, when you buy one of the damned things, you don't know whether to feel like an idiot for paying all that money or to feel really cool that you dropped $40 dollars for one lure that a 2 foot 'cuda could make off with in half a heart beat. To top it off, when you open the box, only then do you figure out that their salesmanship was good enough to make you buy the thing and have the privilege of putting about $5.00 worth of hooks on it on your own dime!

It's kind of like the old James Thurber cartoon in which a guy is sitting at a table in superb high-dollar restaurant. He's staring at a filthy, steaming tennis shoe on his plate. The head waiter is saying: "Oui Monsieur, that ees correct. We gave eet a fancy French name, and you ordered it!"

But there is nothing--and I mean nothing--cooler than owning a "Souls Saltwater Finalist Tuna Casting True Excaliber XXHS." I mean it just sounds like a badass rod that you could use to crank in a cow like it was a perch!

Hell, I bought one, knowing that I didn't really need it and certain that it was too long for me and I probably couldn't cast it worth a damn, but figured that it would be at least cool to have something that looked like an ordinary surf rod but that was loaded with massive steroids. And when people ask me "oohra oohra, is that your rod?" I can tell them "Yes, son, that is a "Souls Saltwater Finalist Tuna Casting True Excaliber XXHS!" Be careful because it can hurt you."

When I whip that sucker out, I may not be able to cast it but I guarantee you that I'll feel like John Holmes at a Eunichs' convention!

When you own this rod, and see some poor slob with a dog like an OTI, a Calstar or, (dare I say it?) a Super Seeker, you can just look down your nose at him like you are drinking champagne and he just found a week-old turd in his punch glass.

Smith's and Carpenters are pretty cool but have nothing like the panache of the "Souls Saltwater Finalist Tuna Casting True Excaliber XXHS!"

OK, so there may be one or two options out there that are almost that cool--the "Zenaq Monster Buster for Ironman" comes pretty close--close, but no cigar. The only possible competition would have to be the Seven Seas "Atomic Sword." I think I need one of those too--and maybe a Carpenter's "Wild Violence" while I am at it.

They may be better fishermen than I am, but until mcgolfer, and Ksong and gman and gunsmoke and MrBill and all the rest of you can convince me you too have such a weapon at your disposal, then Podnuh, to old Uncle Russ, you ain't $hit!

Russ

[MrBill]

Uncle Russ,

Since you have purchased some of the above mention rods, you have officially become a member of the "Blue Blood Tackle Society".

To become a member you must spend a fortune on rods with fancy names, and expensive lures and jigs without hooks. If fact, most members of the BBTS are afraid to use these products in fear that one might break. They use the old trusty Shakespeare "Wonder-rod" from the early days when no other member of the BBTS is present.

Most members of the BBTS don't buy "Smith" rods, because it sounds to American. They are fantastic rods, but what member of the BBTS wants to brag about a Smith?

[Uncle Russ]

Crap, MrBill, some of you guys actually have an real excuse for buying all that crap--at least you occasionally fish.

Actually, some really snazzy named rods masquerade as "Smiths". Another rod I forgot to mention that used to make me quivery all over is the Smith "Komodo Dragon." Jeez. I kept trying to buy one and Randy kept telling me it was not the rod for me--damned near refused to let me have one. Seems that I live over 7,000 miles from the nearest Giant Trevally. Details, details--truth is that I just wanted one. Anyhow, I held off and am no doubt the better for it. Takes a lot of character not to sell some raving yahoo like me something he doesn't need--and that is what I appreciate about folks like Anglers Pro Shop and OTI--back when I was drinking too much the folks at the liquor stores never cut me off.

I did buy a couple of the "Fisherman Long Pen Poppers" which cost half a hundred each (did I mention without hooks?) and look like something you would use to artifically inseminate a Clydesdale. So I rigged one of them up with Owner 76 4/0 trebles tied to the end of 80 pound braid and 130 pound flouro on a Calstar 700XH (didn't have the Souls yet) and a Twinspin with the drag cranked up to about 45 pounds, and took them on a private charter with Captain Eddie out of Venice. Captain Eddie pretty much laughed the whole rig off his boat, advised me to tie on a Tuna Hunter Jr. and then laughingly reset the drag to about 20 pounds by hand. And it worked. gimmedeal caught a yellowfin on the rig. Personally, I could have done it myself, but I was saving my first popper-caught fish for (you guessed it) the Souls Saltwater Finalist True Excaliber XXHS.

So anyway, thanks for including me in the Blue Butt Tackle Society...oh, wait!

Russ

[Uncle Russ]

Just because it does seem to be a really slow news day, I wil also say that I love what they say about their equipment on their websites--or rather, to be more precise, how the language does not survive automatic internet translation. For example, here is what comes out of the translator from the Smith web site concerning the wonderful WRK series (which includes the 80P/35 and the Nirai jigging rod):

"The material, 30 tons +40 the ton graphite being composite, strength approximately 35% rise weight approximately 20% less approximately 60% started hitting less high elastic conversion approximately 10% wonderful numerical value with the 3D cross binding special manufacturing method which winds the graphite cross from 3 directions, in comparison with former manufacturing method.

As a result, to be light and it became strong, in other words easy to use also the rod for the anti- great man, thinly to here, the product whose reliability is high completed.

In order to prevent the over action of the jig, as for the medium elastic graphite material, very as for the section it considers the fact that resistance of smooth torque movement and the fish is absorbed, makes the composite material of medium elasticity and the high elastic graphite, the instantaneous bounce which 40 ton high elastic graphite bat has, controls the running of the fish which from the instant of at a stroke faces to the root.

In 2002 August, the enormous fish of natural shape obscurity and end of the grapple of 3 hour half, the fish becomes, line break. Usually, the fighting of the enormous fish which exceeds 100 kg in order the graphite fiber to break with fatigue extending, 2 hour reaches the limit, but durability proved with this fighting spirit, bet GO on commercialization."

As my 10 year-old grandaughter says: "I'm like whaaaaaaat?"

But then what's even more frightening, if you read that over and over and over, you actually start understanding it.

Russ

[bunile]

Soon I will make Einstein look like a begginer.Just keep reading this over and over and over.

[fishingduck]

Hahaha, that was great pieces of writing. I've always in awe of the Japanese culture. They're just seem so different yet so cool.
Thanks U.Russ.

[sami G]

UNCLE RUSS

[sami G]

UNCLE RUSS
you purchase one of the greatest tuna rod ever made, congraltulation
i guarentee you to have a blast while fighting a fish,
you have to be a beleiver to fish and use those rods.
and those fisherman long penn are just amazing,
i myself had the same experience as you, once a captain see me attaching one at the end of my leader they just laugh at me, but that normally doesn't take to long to gain respect, as one or 2 cast and your hooked.
again thank you for your business and i hope you will enjoy it, at the end of the day some of us like to fish with a style and confidence.

[Uncle Russ]

Thanks, Sami. What is unbelievable about the Long Pen is how far it can cast, although I am worried that a gulf yellowfin might be scared of it it is so big. So far I have fallen in love with three lines of rods. The first was Calstar, then Smith, and now the OTI line.

One group I forgot to mention that you and Randy carry are the KGS (Kevlar-Graphite for Shooting)--the 5' 10", the 6' 8", and the 7 footer. Although they are overkill, I bought these for bay rods using the Stella 1K, 2.5K, and 5K--kind of like a light, medium, and heavy set of rifles for Africa. You could land a good-sized tarpon on the 70MH. These are great little rods with butt joints. I'm not sure what their real intended use is--I would guess they are intended for very light jigging, but that is not what I intend to use them for. And I have not seen any line comparable to them anywhere--I had thought that the 7 footer was kinda-sorta comparable to the older OTI 7 foot popping rod, one of which I was lucky to get from T.J. But it turns out they are very different. The Smith KGS 70MH is lighter, but the OTI can probably handle twice the drag. So I will mostly use the KGS rods for inshore and the OTI 7 footer offshore for a lighter rod.

I use the KGS 510L with the Stella 1000 with 15 pound braid for ranch pond fishing. Poor little bass don't stand a chance.

Russ

[Sea Crappie]

Uncle Russ,

That post would've been worth hijacking the Zenaq thread. Terrible automated translations from Japanese to English provide me an endless source of entertainment. A great place to find some real doozies is PLAT. The guys who run it are great, but I think the translations are priceless.

Sadly I've been aflicted in the same way when it comes to cool Japanese tackle. It takes all I have to not buy a Wild Violence (as it would be utterly useless to me). However (hangs head in shame), I did pick up one of the new Coral Vipers............. how could I say no to that? If they come out with a "Rabid Capybara" I'll buy 2.

On another note, I have no idea what Shibuki means, but that is maybe the greatest lure name ever.